Posts Tagged ‘Robots’


Robo Vampire

March 21st, 2011 | article by | 2 Comments »
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Year: 1988   Company: Filmark International Ltd.   Runtime: 90′
Director: Charles Lee   Writers: William Palmer   Cinematography: Anthony Mang
Music: Alan Wilson   Cast: Robin Mackay, Nian Watts, Harry Miles, Joe Browne, Nick Norman,
George Tripos, David Borg, Diana Byrne, Alan Drury, Ernst Mausser, Sorapong Chatree
Available on OOP DVD from BCI / Eclipse. Product link: Amazon.com

Confession time.  I’ve been slacking off on my Wtf-Film duties as of late, content with letting the movies come to me by way of screeners or the odd pre-order.  That’s not to say that I haven’t covered some good stuff, with Phenomena and The Beyond arriving from Arrow Video or Shout! Factory’s latest MST3K box, but all of those properties fell right into my lap (or mailbox, rather).  The simple sad fact of the matter is that I’ve been lazy, satisfied to bask in the relative comfort of review discs while this site’s purpose fades into the ether.

Well no more, I say!  I long for that elusive high, the blissful intoxication of chancing upon a film of mind-altering strangeness.  It’s high time that the hunt was on again, and I’ll be damned if today’s find didn’t get the dopamine a-flowing.

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Hardware

July 25th, 2010 | article by | 1 Comment »
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film rating:
disc rating:
companies: British Screen Productions
year: 1990
runtime: 93′
country: United Kingdom
director: Richard Stanley
cast: Dylan McDermott, Stacey Travis,
John Lynch, William Hootkins
writers: Steve Macmanus, Kevin O’Neill,
Richard Stanley, Michael Fallon,
and Michael Apostolina
cinematographer: Steven Chivers
disc company: Severin Films
release date: October 13, 2009
retail price: $34.95
disc details: Region A / Dual Layer
feature: 1080p HD
audio: Dolby Digital English [2.0 + 5.1]
subtitles: none
reviewed from a screener provided
by Severin Films LLC.
Order this film from Amazon.com

Plot: In the future, a dismantled military robot reconstructs itself in the apartment of a metal sculptor and goes on a murderous rampage.

I’d not seen Hardware before the screener arrived on my proverbial doorstep, though I do remember seeing the unattractive video box art in my days as a video rental clerk.  It never struck me as anything terribly worth seeing, and certainly didn’t see many rentals in my year or so there.  Besides, I was too busy filling my head with things like The Deadly Spawn (titles that had captured my youthful imagination by cover alone but which I had been forbidden from viewing, and rightly so, as a child) to bother with something I’d otherwise never heard of.  It’s a pity, really, that I didn’t come around to Hardware sooner, but no matter – this stylish and undeniably weird little industrial slasher was worth the wait.

Set in the dystopian near-future, the film concerns scrounger Mo (McDermott) and his sometimes girlfriend Jill (Travis).  When the opportunity to buy something truly unique – disembodied robot parts – comes along courtesy of a mysterious stranger, Mo jumps at it, thinking the parts would make a great Christmas present for his scrap-sculpting girlfriend.  While Jill sleeps the head of the robot, belonging to a dysfunctional combat android, comes back to life and constructs a body for itself out of the odds and ends it finds around her apartment.  From there on out it’s a battle for survival, with the robot killing anyone it can get its claws (or whirring phallic drillbit) into.

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Saturn 3

December 12th, 2009 | article by | No Comments »
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postercompany: ITC and
Transcontinental Films
year: 1980
runtime: 88′
country: United Kingdom
director: Stanly Donen
cast: Farrah Fawcett,
Kirk Douglas, Harvey Keitel
writers: John Barry
and Martin Amis
music: Elmer Bernstein
cinematographer: Billy Williams
out of print in the USA
order this film on DVD
from Amazon.fr

Plot: An isolated food research station operated by two lovers (Fawcett and Douglas) on Saturn’s third moon is visited by a disturbed and murderous flunky (Keitel) and his 8 foot tall cyborg companion, Hector.

Yet another film I remember staring at me from the video store shelves when I was younger, even though I didn’t see it until years later.  Panned critically when released and issued in subpar home video incarnations the world over, Saturn 3 was finally given proper DVD treatment (albeit in France) in 2005.  While inarguably imperfect, this off-kilter and artfully produced bit of space-bound sci-fi horror is worth a second look for those keen on the genre.

Conceived as an epic genre piece to capitalize on the space-horror popularized by Ridley Scott’s Alien the year before, resources for Saturn 3‘s were drastically cut when ITC’s Raise the Titanic went over schedule and over budget.  John Barry (production designer on A Clockwork Orange, Star Wars, and Superman and art director for Saul Bass’ Phase IV), who had begun the project as both writer and director, was eventually removed from the production and replaced by producer and director Stanly Donen (Singin’ in the Rain, The Little Prince).  Originally intended to be far more exploitative, Donen’s final cut of the picture toned down the more horrific and salacious elements of the narrative and left ITC with a film that was, in spite of a name cast (albeit with Keitel overdubbed by Roy Dotrice), almost impossible to market.

The film concerns the murderous and under-achieving technocrat Benson (Keitel), who kills a captain and takes over his mission after failing his psychological examination.  From there he flies to one of Saturn’s moons, to a hydroponics research facility run by two lovers trying to squeak out a monogamous existence on the periphery of the freewheeling and pill-popping culture of the future.  Benson’s mission is to increase the pace of research at the facility (as he says, “Earth is hungry”) by programming the latest in cyborg technology to take over operations there.

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Named Hector, the cyborg would be benign in the hands of a skilled and psychologically sound operator – unfortunately its programming here (literally a brain-to-brain ordeal) is overseen by a mentally unstable egomaniacal jerk who wants little more than to take Farrah Fawcett for himself.  Problems arise quickly after Hector is activated, with Benson’s multitude of psychoses now programmed into a super-human 8 foot monster.  Hector wastes no time in wasting Benson, then does what the man couldn’t do – takes over the research station and its two surviving occupants . . .

There’s certainly a lot wrong with Saturn 3, and one can’t shake the feeling that it was the kind of film that no amount of time in the cutting room could right.  The narrative is floaty and unfocused, drifting laxidaisically from point to point with little in the way of forward momentum.  The original running time, prior to extensive pre-release editing, was reporteldy 103 minutes, though I can’t imagine that 20 minutes tacked on to Saturn 3‘s runtime would help much – it already feels labored at under an hour and a half.

Perhaps the biggest problem rests with Donen, who appears unwilling to delve deeply enough into the twisted sexuality and horror the script hints at.  The result is a claustrophobic scare film all but void of tension and suspense.  Complicating matters is the construction of Hector, who is handsome in design but awkward and ungainly in execution.  Fear isn’t exactly the emotion evoked when one sees him chasing Douglas and Fawcett on his beefy legs, with wiry arms sticking out of his Michaelangeloic torso like hydraulic twigs.

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In the end there are only two real saving graces for the picture – its arresting production design (by Stuart Craig, The Elephant Man) and the phenomenal score by Elmer Bernstein (Robot Monster, Ghostbusters).  Lacking as the action within the sets may be, one can’t fault their design.  The techno-organic construction of the tunnels that weave through the research station are neat enough, and the opening visage of sillouetted space men preparing a ship for take off is as stunning as it is absurd.  Bernstein’s scored roughly an hour’s worth of music for the picture, though much of it went unused.  What is here is exceptional, and the composer transitions effortlessly from the twitterings of electric guitars and synths to sweeping orchestral movements.  At least one of the unused themes would make its way to another of his scores, reworked for the final episode of 1981′s Heavy Metal.

Previously available on pan-and-scanned videos and DVDs mastered from transfers nearly as old as the film itself, French outfit Elephant Films (elephantfilms.com) is to be commended for their efforts here.  Now available in its original theatrical aspect ratio, Saturn 3 finally looks like the competently-produced (if incompetently conceived) film it is.  The new transfer is anamorphic and progressive, with decent detail and great  color, and contrast.  Damage crops up from time to time, but is limited to dust and speckling and isn’t prevalent enough to detract from the visuals.  Audio is available in both English (Dolby Digital 2.0) and French (Dolby Digital 5.1), with removable French subtitles available.  Supplements are limited to a trailer for the film (and a vast collection of other Elephant Films offerings), cast and crew filmographies, and a brief gallery of photos.

Mark Saturn 3 down as a failure, but an interesting one.  The Elephant Films DVD does proper justice to the great visuals and Bernstein’s winner of a score sounds fantastic as presented here.  I’m tepid about recommending the film to anyone but devout sci-fi enthusiasts (lest it be a complete waste of their time), but fans would be Bensons not to pick up the French DVD.

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Battaglie negli Spazi Stellari

November 15th, 2009 | article by | 3 Comments »
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postera.k.a. Cosmo 2000
companies: Nais Film and
La Cinematografie Internazionali Associate
year: 1977
runtime: 92′
country: Italy
director: Alfonso Brescia
cast: John Richardson, Yanti Somer,
Walter Maestosi, Massimo de Cecco,
Gisela Hahn, West Buchanan, Malisa Longo
writers: Giacomo Mazzocchi
and Massimo Lo Jacono
not on home video in the USA

Plot: The giant robot ruler of a distant asteroid attempts to conquer the Earth with a fleet of flying saucers and an army of human-duplicating space zombies.

This is either the first or second of Alfonso Brescia’s pentalogy of STAR WARS-inspired space adventures, and I’m not sure it really matters which.  Brescia seems to have filmed it side by side with ANNO ZERO: GUERRA NELLO SPAZIO / COSMOS: WAR OF THE PLANETS, with which it is often confused (including at the IMDB), and the two share not only special effects, costumes, and props, but a good deal of cast and crew as well.  Like LA BESTIA NELLO SPAZIO / THE BEAST IN SPACE three years later, BATTAGLIE NEGLI SPAZI STELLARI was never picked up for any sort of distribution in the United States and has since become the most obscure entry in the series.

A shame really, as BATTAGLIE is one of the better of Brescia’s tightly budgeted inepics.  The screenplay by Giacomo Mazzocchi and Massimo Lo Jacono [STAR ODYSSEY] has more in common with one of Antonio Margheriti’s hip Gamma I films than with George Lucas’ budding franchise, and focuses less on fantastical interstellar combat and more on Earthbound dramatics.  Brescia’s budget simply wouldn’t allow for anything approaching Lucas’ brand of special effects action, though he and his effects team do pull out all the stops in the end and allow for a final, brief flying saucer invasion of Earth.

The story concerns a space captain named Mike, played by COSMOS: WAR OF THE PLANETS star John Richardson [BLACK SUNDAY], who is called into service, along with his girlfriend (Yanti Somer), after a ship is destroyed by flying saucers while investigating an asteroid rich in rare elements.  Mike joins forces with mysterious yet friendly alien visitor Irk (Walter Maestosi) and his child companion (who carries and, more importantly, uses a silver ball capable of disintigrating people) against the huge robotic ruler of the asteroid and his collection of mummy-wrapped and maggot-ridden space zombies.  Things become more complicated when it is discovered that some of those zombies have been made to look, sound, and act like important members of Earth’s space force!

It’s odd to think that Brescia may have, for once, been ahead of the curve with this film, considering that the walking dead wouldn’t become a fixture of contemporary Italian genre cinema until George Romero’s DAWN OF THE DEAD and Lucio Fulci’s ZOMBI 2 were released there two years later.  The zombies in this case only reveal their true form sporadically and are seen either wearing masks or imitating the living for most of their time on screen.  In the rare instances that we do see them for what they are they’re pretty nasty, their pulsing faces wriggling with fly larvae and covered in a bloody mush.  They may never eat people in the tradition of their more famous counterparts, but these space zombie manage to kill plenty of hapless Earthlings all the same.

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From a production standpoint BATTAGLIE NEGLI SPAZI STELLARI is a few steps ahead of the rest of the entries in the series, and benefits from a few outdoor location shoots and some fine costume design by Elena de Cupis.  Marcello Giombini’s electronic score makes for fine accompaniment throughout, particularly when the bizarrely catchy theme song We are not Alone here in Space kicks in over the opening and closing credits.  Filled with loopy lyrics about “new UFOs” and “super human men” and sung by a chorus of men for whom English is obviously not a first language, the song (recycled for COSMOS: WAR OF THE PLANETS) must be heard to be believed.

Also moderately impressive are the special effects, handled by a variety of people and organizations (including animation house Studio H and Biamonte Cinegroup).  Many of them, especially vistas of Earth ships sailing through the stars, already look off color and duped here, while some look positively pristine.  Original to this production are a number of angles showing UFOs tracking along in groups of various sizes, most of which would be recycled in LA GUERRA DEI ROBOT / THE WAR OF THE ROBOTS and SETTE UOMINI D’ORO NELLO SPAZIO / STAR ODYSSEY.  Fun as the effects can be, we see far too much of them.  Shots are repeated over and over again, often multiple times in a single scene, and then looped through again on the view screens seen in sets for spaceship interiors and the Earth control center.

Brescia’s direction is as inept as ever here, though that’s really part of the fun.  It’s certainly reasonable enough for the material at hand, with its weird drama (Richardson and Somer are introduced via a comedic fishing trip) and pages of ludicrous techno-babble.  Editor Carlo Reali makes the most of the footage available to him, repeating some takes three and four times to stretch the length of scenes for which additional footage was obviously never shot.

004It’s a minor miracle that BATTAGLIE NEGLI SPAZI STELLARI is as entertaining as it is with all of its technical and budgetary shortcomings.  It’s a far cry from the Antonio Margheriti science fantasies that came before and will look dated even when compared to its contemporaries from elsewhere in the world, but it’s great fun all the same.  I can only hope that someone like Mya Communications or Severin Films will take to giving this a proper English friendly release at some point in the future, but for now it remains unavailable on home video.  Available or not, this one gets my recommendation.


The Beast in Space

November 9th, 2009 | article by | 3 Comments »
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poster

This locandina for THE BEAST IN SPACE is, in accordance with the film itself, rather derivative. Not only does the artwork rip-off that commissioned for the release of John Boorman's ZARDOZ, but the still images included are from the earlier Brescia space film STAR ODYSSEY.

a.k.a. La Bestia nello Spazio
companies: LU. MA. FIN and S.I.G.M.A. E. CO.
year: 1980
runtime: 92′
country: Italy
director: Alfonso Brescia
cast: Sirpa Lane, Vassili Karis,
Venantino Venantini, Lucio Rosato,
Robert Hundar, Marina Hedman
dvd company: Severin Films
release date: April 29, 2008
retail price: $29.95
disc details: Region 1 / Single Layer
order this film from Amazon.com:
unrated version | xxx version
reviewed from a screener provided
by Severin Films, LLC

Plot: A group of astronauts are sent deep into space to a planet rich in the rare metal Antalium.  Once there they discover a world ruled by a megalomaniacal robot sex fiend, his groovy beast-man servant and an army of blond android warriors.

The first STAR WARS revolutionized the sci-fi fantasy genre in any number of ways, namely by placing a renewed emphasis on action and expensive special effects.  It’s runaway success ensured that imitators would be riffing on its formula for decades to come, and none of these imitators seem to have been so prolific as the low-end Italian exploitation director Alfonso Brescia.  In the span of three years between 1977 and 1980, Brescia managed to co-write and direct a tersely connected pentalogy of such knock-offs (along with a host of unrelated efforts).

His production ethic was simple and cost effective – create a single laundry list of props, sets, and special effects takes, and then write scripts for which they could be utilized time and time again.  After three serious efforts (BATTAGLIE NEGLI SPAZI STELLARI,  ANNO ZERO: GUERRA NELLO SPAZIO / COSMOS: WAR OF THE PLANETS and LA GUERRA DEI ROBOT / THE WAR OF THE ROBOTS) and one outright spoof  (1979′s SETTE UOMINI D’ORO NELLO SPAZIO /  STAR ODYSSEY), the well was running quite dry.  What were money-hungry Italian producers to do?

Why, rip off another popular film from the time period, steal its star, and dust off those props, sets, and effects for one more go.  One has to give the film makers credit for shear absurdity in this department as they found that inspiration in, of all places, Walerian Borowczyk’s bizarre erotic opus LA BETE from five years earlier.  Simply adding graphic sexual content to their space picture was obviously deemed too mundane, and THE BEAST IN SPACE opts to focus instead on the Borowczyk film’s most infamous moment – the rape of a young and prudish aristocrat by a randy and hugely endowed anthropomorphic beast.  A family friendly space adventure this was certainly not to be.

70′s sex icon Sirpa Lane (THE SECRET NIGHTS OF LUCREZIA BORGIA) was attached to be BEAST’s star attraction and doomed to a far less glamourous fate than in the Borowczyk production – falling victim to the lustful intentions of a lascivious man-beast and a world-dominating super-robot and a cocky starship captain named Larry who likes to compare the wonders of space to animal asses.  Needless to say, Lane’s professional career had seen better days, and its a pity to see her used here as nothing but an admissions booster.  Director Brescia approaches her (as well as the other) erotic moments with the same aesthetic barbary that renders the drama that surrounds them so lifeless and ineffectual.  There is certainly sex to be had here, though it’ll prove of little interest to even the most devoted of skin aficianados.

Aside from its adults-only classification and a handful of sleazy and salacious moments, THE BEAST IN SPACE is par for the course as far as Brescia’s science fiction efforts are concerned.  Characters sit around spouting all manner of ludicrous dialogue (“Sector two damaged.  The bastard hit the module!”) while the editor unspools reems of stock effects in a ramshackle fashion about them.  Many of these effects shots are rather well accomplished, with considerable attention paid in making them as believable as the budget would allow, though their presence in three previous films has exponentially lessened their novelty value.

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Those trademarks of the previous Nais Film produced Brescia space pictures are all present and accounted for, including hordes of blond-wigged silver-suited android fighting men with clunky glowing swords, though that company’s name is nowhere to be found in the credits scroll.  Scripting (by Brescia and Aldo Crudo) is at least as convoluted and incoherent as in the rest of those films, and the effort is rendered even harder to follow by one of the most incongruous Itailian overdubs I’ve yet encountered.  That’s not to say that this low-tech patchwork of disparate genres is without its bizarre charms (the sight of women in space suits becoming hot and bothered by anamorphic stock footage of horses copulating is perversely hilarious), but you’ll need an unflinching adoration for cinematic awfulness to appreciate them.

The shaky distribution rights to Brescia’s previous space operas have fallen by the wayside, leaving us with nothing but shoddy bargain-bin releases of them to choose from.  Not so with the previously unreleased THE BEAST IN SPACE, which only recently received its stateside debut thanks to the due diligence and possible insanity of cult DVD distributor Severin Films.  The company has shown a remarkable dedication to the title, presenting audiences with not one but two separate releases of it – including one of the obscure hardcore cut of the picture.

The feature presentations for both discs, triple-x inserts and gigantic rubber man-beast penis aside, are pretty much identical.  BEAST is presented in 16:9 enhanced and progressive scan widescreen transfer that, in spite of frequent speckling and other damage, puts the digital representations of Brescia’s other space films to shame.  Colors and contrast are both well represented and the grainy image presents with good detail when the cinematography (frequently intentionally blurry and diffused) allows for it.  Audio is represented by a suitable Dolby Digital monophonic Italian track, augmented with English subtitles that, barring a few typos, are well translated.  An interview with actor and artist Venantino Venantini is included on the unrated disc, while the xxx edition gets just over two minutes of hardcore outtakes.  Both discs come with a  trailer, the sexual explicitness of which varies in accordance with which cut of the film is represented.

Severin Films is to be commended for finally giving this, undoubtedly the strangest of Italy’s science fiction offerings, a proper release on digital, though the high retail price will probably deter most casual buyers.  In this case that’s probably not so bad a thing, as THE BEAST IN SPACE is definitely not for everyone.  Its off-kilter blend of outer space antics and sleazy sex was enough to keep the Wtf-filmer in me casually entertained, but your mileage will definitely vary.


Robot Jox

June 26th, 2009 | article by | No Comments »
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Empire Pictures [1990] 84′
country: United States
director: STUART GORDON
cast: GARY GRAHAM, ANNE-MARIE JOHNSON,
cast: PAUL KOSLO, ROBERT SAMPSON
Order this disc from AMAZON.COM

I vividly recall the single television spot for ROBOT JOX I managed to catch prior to it’s 1990 theatrical release – I also remember the excitement it elicited in my six year old heart. I doubt it ever played in either of the two theatres in my home town [one a two-screener, the other a single-screen dollar job] and if it did, I certainly missed it. It was at least a year, possibly more, before JOX was on the Pay-per-View circuit – it was the talk of the town with my first grader friend base, and I imagine that my mother was only one of many to pony up her credit card to ensure their then-seven year olds’ eternal happiness.

Needless to say, I wasn’t disappointed. I still have the original VHS to which it was recorded, in fact. My family undoubtedly suffered extensive psychological trauma from seeing it so often from then on, but I loved every second of it. What’s more, I still do.

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Devil Girl From Mars

March 6th, 2009 | article by | No Comments »
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Danziger Productions Ltd. [1954] 77′
country: United Kingdom
director: DAVID MACDONALD
cast: HUGH MCDERMOTT, HAZEL COURT
cast: PETER REYNOLDS, PATRICIA LAFFAN

A motley assortment of people gather at an isolated Scottish inn, including an escaped murderer, an American newspaper man, and an elderly English professor. The group distract themselves in a number of ways, with the newspaper man recognizing the escaped convict and threatening to turn him in to the proper authorities. Suddenly, a space ship thunders out of the sky and lands a short distance from the inn – after it cools, the Martian woman Nyah steps out. It seems that her intentions had been to land in London, but her ship was damaged and she was forced to land elsewhere. It seems that Mars suffered through a war of the sexes, resulting in a superior female race – but males have become all but useless since then, and Nyah is in search of new breeding stock.

She encircles the inn in an invisible electric wall, leaving the inn’s residents with little to do but think of various schemes to defeat the Martian, who intends to continue her voyage to London as planned once her ship – made of an organic metal – repairs itself. Plan after plan to stop her fails, as the Earthlings prove no match for her ray gun, hypnotic eyes, or ginormous robot servant Chani. With her ship repaired and ready to go, the escaped convict boards her ship under the pretense of being her guide to London but with other plans in mind. Can he possibly stop Nylah’s prototype ship and an impending full-on Martian invasion?

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