Piranha 3D

film rating:
company: Dimension Films
and The Weinstein Company
year: 2010
runtime: 88′
director: Alexandre Aja
cast: Elisabeth Shue, Steven R. McQueen,
Jessica Szohr, Ving Rhames,
Jerry O’Connell, Richard Dreyfuss,
Christopher Lloyd, Eli Roth
writers: Pete Goldfinger
and Josh Stolberg
cinematography: John R. Leonetti
music: Michael Wandmacher
Out in wide release now

Plot: Spring break festivities at a lakeside resort come to a relentlessly bloody end after a species of piranha thought extinct for millions of years unexpectedly resurfaces.

It’s worth repeating before going too much into things that I’m a huge fan of the original Piranha, the Joe Dante-directed John Sayles-penned Roger Corman-produced cult classic that took drive-in audiences by storm in the summer of 1978. After a dreadful official sequel produced by Ovidio G. Assontis and a limp mid-90s Corman remake, I was necessarily underwhelmed when news of yet another retread came across the wire. But contemporary cult powerhouses Dimension Films and the Weinstein Company have done more than just repeat that tired history, they’ve set out to unleash an indelible exploitation experience for the ages. I plunked down a hard-earned $13 and saw their film last night in all the gimmicky glory RealD stereoscopic projection has to offer and have to confess – it was one hell of a show.

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Disco Dolls in “Hot Skin” in 3D, The

3-D TV Corporation [1977] –’
country: United States
director: STEPHEN GIBSON [as Norm De Plume]
cast: SERENA, MONIQUE FABERGE,
cast: MIKE RANGER, LESLIE BOVEE

Ever since I relocated to Minneapolis on August the 1st of last year, I’ve been a frequent patron of the midnight movie screenings presented by the Uptown Theatre every Saturday evening. It’s through these screenings that I’ve finally been able to see a number of films as they were originally meant to be seen – David Lynch’s ERASERHEAD [1977], Stanley Kubrick’s A CLOCKWORK ORANGE [1971], and even L. Q. Jones’ A BOY AND HIS DOG [1975], just to name a few.

This weekend the Uptown presented me with my first opportunity to see the miracle (chuckle) of 3D on the big screen. That it was through a screening of the little known 1977 porno flick “HOT SKIN” IN 3D was all the better.

The words “Deep Vision” have never had such locker-room connotations . . .

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